Pretty Enough – A Moment in Time

Pretty Enough – A Moment in Time

Over twenty years ago I was riding in the car with my best friend thinking, she is so beautiful, and her skin looks so soft. I wonder how she keeps her skin looking so good. It looks completely unblemished; smooth.

Pretty enoughI wonder if she is wearing makeup. I wonder if she knows how beautiful her skin looks, I’m sure she must. I wish my skin looked like hers, I should just ask her what she uses on her skin. I can’t do that: she will think I’m silly.

She always seems so put together and nothing affects her. I wonder how she does it. We both have children, we both have demanding men in our lives, how can she take the time to do all that she does to keep herself looking so good?

I wish I had time to take care of myself better. I wish I could afford better cleaning and moisturizing products for my skin. I wish I could afford better makeup. I wonder if she washes her face every night? They say that it helps your skin if you wash your face before going to bed. I always forget to wash my face before going to bed. I wish I was better at remembering to wash up before bed.

I really need to take better care of myself, maybe if I did I would have nice skin like hers. It just looks so flawless. It really glows. I must start taking better care of myself and then maybe just maybe my skin will at least look better even if it can’t look as good as hers.

“What do you use on your face?” My friend asked. “I mean it looks so good, are you wearing makeup?”

My mouth fell open. “Are you kidding me? I was just looking at your face and thinking how great it looked and wishing my face looked as smooth as yours. Are you wearing any makeup?” I asked.

She smiled and said, “No I’m not and I can’t believe you think my skin looks good.”

I smiled back at her. It really made me wonder what society was doing to us that we didn’t think we looked good enough; that we weren’t pretty enough as we were, either of us. I never forgot that moment; that moment when each of us thought the other looked better and we couldn’t see our own beauty.

Learning to love yourself just the way you are is empowering, as well as deciding how to define who you are and what you look like. It is time for you to stand up and be who you are. It is time to be bold, brave, and daring.

Daring to be Me A Challenge for March 2013.

 

PageLines- picture20193.jpgMorgan Dragonwillow: Rebel dancing with words, intuitive cook, recovering perfectionist, poet & author that (mostly) doesn’t let her fears get in the way of her passion for writing and creating. She is team leader at @StoryDam, creatrix of #OctPoWriMo, and you can find her at, A Poet’s Kitchen, cooking up simply delicious meals. She lives in Marietta, Ga. with her loving and patient partner, their dog that thinks she’s a princess, and the cat that reminds her that she isn’t.
You can find her on Google+

 

 

CreateSpace Cover for KdpPurchase Wild Woman Waking Now on Amazon in Paperback and EBook.

“Sometimes poets write what we wish we could say, and they tell us what we need to know. The poems in Wild Woman Waking lead us to a place where we can proudly refuse to be “bent and broken”; instead, they document a journey to self-acceptance, peace, and understanding – where in a community of women, we celebrate and dance as Mud Women. We become women of spirit and keepers of our own keys.” ~Beth Camp

 

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14 thoughts on “Pretty Enough – A Moment in Time

  1. Oh, I can’t decide if this makes me sad or happy. It’s so unfortunate that we are so programmed to see the beauty in other people but not ourselves. At the same time, it’s great that the two of you shared that moment, that vulnerability, and are now more aware of the insecurities we all feel.

  2. Angela said it for me. I was sad reading it (and thinking I need to be better about washing my face at night), and then just happy that you had that moment together.

  3. This is beautifully written. The internal dialogue spells out the confusion, insecurity, and envy perfectly. Then the transition to verbal dialogue and the realization of a common insecurity…wow.

    It makes me sad, though. On several levels. One, that women are programmed not to accept compliments by saying, “Thank you,” but instead, by denying it and saying, “Oh, no, I look so awful.” Two, that most of us really are insecure enough that we do this because we need the reassurance that follows. And three, that we don’t talk about it more and realize that we all feel this way from time to time.

    Thank you for sharing this!

  4. I love this. The others said why at least as well as I could at the moment, but I needed to post and add, Thank you, Morgan. This was good in the purest sense of the word, in heart, spirit…texture. This was incredible.

  5. I love, love, love this post, Morgan. So insightful!

    You’ve zeroed in on women and beauty, which is a huge topic in and of itself…

    In my case (which I am sure is not isolated) I had several boyfriends who kept my insecurities alive by telling me that I was fat, ugly and so forth – but they “loved” me anyway. (“You’re nothing to look at and your boobs are too small, but you’ve a great personality,” they’d say, for instance. Having been raised in America and teased in High School, I had no idea that any man could find something less than a D cup sexy!)

    I look back at photos of myself at these allegedly fat and ugly times and laugh because I was thin and rather cute – if I do say so, myself. It makes me sad and angry that I was belittled into feeling otherwise. What I saw in the mirror was a reflection of their ideas, alas, not what was actually there.

    I think that, in one relationship in particular, I was made to feel ugly as a way of keeping me under control. He did it out of his fear that I’d leave him if I knew I was cute, I guess.

    Anyway…

    I used to keep all my compliments to myself and assume that other people, both male and female, knew how beautiful/smart/kind/uplifting/wonderful/[insert positive trait here] they were.

    Once I had my coffeehouse, I realized that people have no idea about these things! It’s one of the things I miss the most about living in Italy is that giving other people compliments is a huge part of their culture.

    Well… I’ve rambled so long in my comment here, Morgan, that I think I may have to do a blog post on this topic, as well.

    Thanks for the insight and inspiration – as always. Btw, have I told you lately that you are beautiful, insightful, fiery, energetic and just plain wonderful?

    ~Tui

    • Loved your long sharing of words Tui! It reminds me of our early comments back and forth with each other and how I often left a lengthy reply. Sometimes we just have a lot to say. 😀

      My heart goes out to that younger you that had men in her life tell her she wasn’t beautiful. You are beautiful, both inside and out, truly. I never thought I was beautiful but it wasn’t because of the men in my life. I felt like I was fat and not very smart. I look back at pictures during this time in my life and I am amazed. I was 5’8″ and only 135. That is not fat. The not very smart part was due to a man. I think he was threatened by a woman with a brain especially one that might be as smart or smarter than he was. We both took the GED together and I scored higher three out of five and even though his average was still higher it nearly killed him. He spent the next ten years finding little ways to undermine my intelligence. I finally wizened up and left.

      I hope I you do write a post about all that you shared above because you have often inspired me to do the same.

      I keep hearing little tidbits about this coffeehouse and I am dying to hear more.

      Peace,
      Morgan

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